Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize