Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
