so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
