dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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