we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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