the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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