everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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