dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
