Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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