I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
