So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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