My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
There r osticjed everywhere
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
