I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
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