i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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