My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
