Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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