It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
