And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
