Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
