Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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