thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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