the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
