Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Your cock deserves a montage
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
