Where did you get a picture of my penis
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
We need to get me chipped asap
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
