Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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