So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
