Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
