There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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