She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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