You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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