okay pat passed out under dana's car
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
