Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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