some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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