I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
