last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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