Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
