Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
