We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
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