I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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