So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I stole a fireplace last night.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
