Fuck appropriateness.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
