i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Fuck appropriateness.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I'm getting married
To pizza
Randomize
