Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
are you so shy because you have an std?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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