duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize