Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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