If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
