Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
