Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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