11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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