I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
