billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
