did you get engaged???
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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